“Criticism”- it either breaks you or builds you, depending on how you see it. We are all told daily to see it as a motivator. However, nobody tells us, “how.” How do you gain confidence in yourself when even your parents have lost faith in you? How do you see your worth when friends make you feel worthless? How to make it when people have made it their top priority to pull you down continually? So many hows and these questions hunt us every minute of our lives. Motivational speakers tell us to keep our heads high and focus on the more significant good cause when you’re being criticized; chances are you’re on the right road- something I don’t agree with totally, but that’s not the issue.
My main reason for writing this is to give my thought on criticism and try to provide an answer to all these questions. Let’s start by stating an instance: you and your parents. Parents have mastered the art of pointing out their children’s every mistake and making sure it’s never repeated. They correct us in ways sometimes that are harsh and hurtful. And this has led to corrupt relationships between parents and their children. What I’m trying to say is this, our parents are our first critics. They make it their purpose to point out every mistake, and we don’t usually accept it and see it as a “motivation. “ Still think it’s easy?
If we can’t accept our faults from people that have known us our entire lives and want the best from us, how can we from people who hardly know us? Well, that’s why you’re reading this- to understand how to. And it’s not hard as it seems. The easiest way is to be the person criticizing you. I mean, put yourself in the person’s shoes and see yourself through their eyes. If it’s your parents, try being your mom or dad and see yourself as your child. Are you the kind of child you would want? Do that, and I guarantee you that you’ll find a lot of answers.
When dealing with critics, we often overlook the fact that no matter how much false things people say about you, there’s a little bit of truth in it. See, before a person starts criticizing you, they know something about you, sometimes your weaknesses, and those things are what they use and manufacture the lies they use against you. So while you sit and blast at your “haters” as you call them, remember that whatsoever they are saying has some level of truth to it. Look into what they’re saying, untie their words bit by bit, stay calm and try to figure out why they’re saying it instead of always posting “haters make me famous. “
Sit and think thoroughly about your critic's words, try and be them just for a second, and sometimes you’ll understand that you’re not the best person and that they have some right to say the things they say to you.
It’s based on these things that I don’t just tell people to see criticism as a motivation only. See criticism as a way to improve on yourself and become a better person continually. The truth is, there’s no one perfect, but once you’re in a constant state of improvement, you’re headed towards perfection.
So remember this, to see criticism as a motivation, you need to be your critics and see yourself through their eyes.
Thank you!
By: Korpo M. Selay
Public Affairs Officer (PAO)
Project Change - Liberia
www.prochangeinliberia.org or @prochangeinliberia